


I Cannot Wait To See You Fail

by RobinsonsWereHere



Series: Plant a Little Happiness (Let The Roots Run Deep) [5]
Category: Psych (TV 2006)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Family Feels, Feels, Lassie Come Home SPOILERS, Post-Canon, Pre-Parental Panic, Pregnancy, henry's not helping, jules just wants to Sleep, shawn's losing it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:20:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25292305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RobinsonsWereHere/pseuds/RobinsonsWereHere
Summary: SPOILERS FOR PSYCH 2: LASSIE COME HOME(minor spoilers but still)A year after the events of the second movie, Shawn and Juliet are expecting a new arrival of their own. But a hard conversation with Henry puts a damper on Shawn's excitement.
Relationships: Henry Spencer & Shawn Spencer, Juliet O'Hara/Shawn Spencer
Series: Plant a Little Happiness (Let The Roots Run Deep) [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1941595
Comments: 12
Kudos: 54





	I Cannot Wait To See You Fail

**Author's Note:**

> I am known for fics involving shules babies and after what we almost got in that movie you bet your ass I'm gonna write more fics involving shules babies! As it says in the summary, this is a while after the movie-- Shawn and Jules have had plenty of time to talk, so this baby is a happy thing for both of them... mostly.

Shawn paces the loft’s “hallway” that connects the living area and kitchen to the guest room. No, not the guest room. The nursery. 

The closer Jules gets to her due date, the more Shawn freaks out. She’s just hit six months this week, and Shawn isn’t sure he’s going to make it through the last trimester.

“Stop pacing, kid.”

Oh, and having his dad in town for the weekend isn’t helping.

“Why are you still here, Dad?”

Henry turns around to look at him over the back of the couch. “Gee, I don’t know, maybe for the baby shower you invited me to?”

“Dad, everyone left by eight. It’s almost ten!”

“Well, Shawn, after you _avoided_ me all night, maybe I wanted a moment to talk to you!”

“I haven’t been avoiding you,” Shawn scoffs. 

That's just what he’s been doing, though. From the very morning he sat with Jules in the doctor’s office and watched the squiggly blob on the ultrasound, he’s been dreading more advice from his dad. Not when he can’t get Henry’s first tip out of his head.

_I cannot wait to see you fail._

“Really? Because I’ve been calling every week, and speaking almost exclusively to Juliet.”

Shawn shrugs. “Jules is doing the more interesting part of this.”

“But you’re doing the part I can help with, Shawn,” Henry presses.

Turning away, Shawn finds himself clenching his teeth. “Maybe I don’t want your help.”

“I know, I know, you’re stubborn,” Henry sighs. “But see, maybe it’s my fault. I’ve never been super reachable to you, have I, Shawn?”

“I don’t need you to be reachable.” Shawn thinks his intestines are trying to tie themselves in knots.

“See, that’s what I’m saying! I’m not sure either of us really know how to support or lean on each other, Shawn. But maybe-- maybe now is a good time for us to learn. What would you say if I was thinking about moving up to San Francisco?”

“No!” Shawn doesn’t even mean to speak, but he shouts out before he can help it.With a wince, he scrubs a hand over his face.

_Jules is sleeping. Calm down. Don’t yell._

“Dad, I don’t… Jules and I will be fine. Really. We don’t need you to move all the way up here.”

Henry frowns; he’s quieted, almost backed down, since Shawn had snapped at him. “You both work, Shawn… I could watch the kid during the day, once he’s older…”

“Might be a girl,” Shawn corrects, out of habit. “And Jules and Selene have already started researching future daycares, so I think we’re good.”

“Shawn, are you _trying_ to shut me out? I’m sorry, I just don’t understand what’s going on here… do you not trust me with your kid?”

“Dad, I don’t trust myself!”

Henry blinks.

Shawn sighs. “You know what I’ve been thinking about, for… months? You know what haunts my dreams and is _stuck_ in my head?”

“What?”

“Do you even…” Shawn flops onto the couch, his energy sapped. “Do you remember the first thing you said to me about fatherhood? When I first thought Jules was pregnant?”

“I’m pretty sure it was something along the lines of ‘congrats, you’re in for a hell of a ride’.” Henry frowns down at him.

“No, before that.” Shawn shakes his head. “The _first_ time.”

“Ohhh.” Henry clearly has a lightbulb moment, but he still hasn’t gotten it. “The conversation in the hospital, while you were guarding Lassiter?”

“No.” Shawn stares aimlessly at the ceiling. “Before that.”

“Shawn, I’m confused.” Henry legitimately looks like he has no clue what’s going on.

“Wow.” Shawn laughs harshly. “You really don’t remember. Well, I am the one with the photographic memory.”

Henry gives him a look. Shawn looks away again, standing up. He feels a burning need to put some space between him and his dad. “You told me that you couldn’t wait for me to become a father… because you couldn’t wait to see me fail.”

His dad looks like he’s been slapped. “Shawn… I didn’t mean that…”

“Yeah?” Shawn doesn’t want to keep talking until he can stop his voice from breaking on every word.

“I mean, c’mon, after I _knew_ what was going on… why can’t you think about what I said then?”

“I don’t know, Dad,” Shawn grumbles, “it seems to me like a planned apology would be more rehearsed, less true, than something you just _say,_ something that slips out from somewhere deep inside you where you’re trying to keep it hidden--”

“I’m sorry, Shawn!” Henry throws his hands in the air. “What do you want me to say? Honestly, it sounds like you’ve got some shit you need to work out, too. This isn’t all my fault!”

“Yeah, it is, Dad! Why do you think I’m so fucking terrified right now? Why do you think I’m losing more sleep than Jules is? If it weren’t for you, I wouldn't know just how badly a dad can mess up.” Shawn shakes his head. “I’ll tell you one thing you don’t get credit for, Pop. I have gotten over myself. I am _excited_ for this baby, and I’m going to do my damn best to make sure they know how loved they are, unconditionally. And that is absolutely no thanks to you.”

“Shawn, that’s not fair.” Henry folds his arms.

Shawn only scoffs.

“I did my best, Shawn! Did you ever think of that!?”

“I don’t care, Dad! It doesn’t matter if you _thought_ you were doing the right thing by, I don’t know, grooming me to be a cop and nothing else, locking me in a trunk, never saying you loved me! You fucked me up! And I don’t want to do that to my kid! So yeah, maybe I have been avoiding you! Because I don’t want you anywhere near me, or this baby! I don’t want you near my family!”

Breathing hard, his heart thudding in his chest, Shawn thinks he might have crossed a line. He can’t bring himself to care.

Neither man says a word, the room silent. And then, the sound of the big wooden door rolling open.

“Shawn?” Juliet sounds tired, and Shawn feels a flash of guilt for waking her. “What’s going on? I heard shouting…”

“I’m sorry, hon,” he murmurs, all of the fire gone from his voice. “We didn’t mean to wake you.” He doesn’t even loom at Henry as he crosses the room to hold Juliet.

She leans into his shoulder and takes her hand, bringing it to rest on her belly. “What’s the matter?”

“Nothing,” he lies. “Dad was just leaving.”

“Shawn--”

“You are.” He lifts his head from Juliet’s hair to glare at Henry.

“Alright, alright.” Henry holds up his hands. “Sorry, Juliet. G’night.”

“Goodnight,” she replies, sounding confused.

Shawn pulls her even closer, soaking in her warmth and not watching his dad leave. When the door closes, Juliet turns to look up at him. “You wanna tell me what that was about?”

“You don’t need to worry about it,” he deflects. Under his hand, he feels the press of a tiny limb. “Aww, look who’s up.”

Jules huffs. “That means I’m not going to sleep anytime soon.”

“I’ll give you a backrub or something,” Shawn offers. “Let’s just… let’s go to bed.”

“Alright.” Juliet takes his hand and leads him back to the bedroom. “Shawn?”

He pauses while searching for a pajama shirt. “Yeah?”

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” she says softly, “but I’m worried about being a parent, too. You’re not alone.”

“I know.” Shawn paces over to the bed to kiss her cheek, then her belly. “As long as I’ve got the two of you… that’s all I need.”

**Author's Note:**

> couldn't resist the shules fluff at the end ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


End file.
